How to Hide an Erection

Knowing how to hide an erection can save you from social suicide! We’ve all been there, for whatever reason, where a certain something pops up unwanted or unexpected, however there are a few easy tips to help mitigate this potentially disastrous situation.

Steps

1- Prevention is the best cure. Avoid silk underwear or fabrics that ‘feel nice’. Also, it’s a good idea to ‘keep on top of things’ i.e. is this a common occurrence? If so, it may be an idea to ‘relieve tension’ in advance. Should you still be suffering, endeavour to always wear loose clothing as this will help you hide your issue.

2-The waistband trick. Should you have a jumper on that is thick enough to hide something sizeable protruding upwards, slipping your erection to poke out through the top of your underwear will help it to point upwards, rather than outwards. Be careful here however, as should your jumper rise, not only will your erection be evident, but it will also be exposed.

3- Adjustments using your hand in your pocket. Should you be wearing trousers or shorts with pockets, place a hand in one and manoeuvre your penis to run in the direction of your fingers, to palm, to wrist. Alternatively, if you’re sitting down, adjust yourself to run down the inside of your leg (if not wearing loose shorts!). Try to touch it as little as possible in order to avoid stimulation.

4- It’s easier to hide when sitting down due to the folds of your clothing.

5- If you have minimal clothing on, is there something you can hide behind? A pillow/cushion, or a briefcase if you’re at work perhaps?

6- Getting rid. Some ideas to encourage flaccidity include: going for a walk, trying to work out complex sums in your head, hold something chilly against your willy, read something written in language that you’re not accustomed to (Shakespearean English, Financial chatter, a scientific paper etc),

Tips

Know in advance what works best for you. Don’t leave it until you’re actually faced with the problem to work out how best to solve it!